My Thoughts

If It’s Loving That You Want

I’ve been thinking about relationships.

Not romantic ones, but the ones that friends make, and I guess relationships with enemies as well. Lately I’ve been challenged to love people differently. It seems to me that one of my major problems in life has been that I always think that I can protect those I love from their decisions. I’ve always been told that I try to save everyone, and some events in my life lately have shown me that it is not possible . I think the problem with trying to fix everyone’s life is that you forget to fix yourself as well. Actually, I think the point of trying to fix everyone’s life is that you are able to ignore the mess that your life might be at the moment. The reason I say this, is because I know I do it a lot, in fact I’ve become a pro at avoiding my not so perfect life, and thinking that it’s my job to help others with their lives.

I’ve been blessed with some awesome friends, friends who challenge my thinking and force me to look within myself to change for the better. Sometimes though those friendships can be difficult, because people are difficult, and relationships as a result are difficult. It’s even harder when a relationship consists of someone like me who is always trying to plan it out. Lately though I have come to the painful conclusion that, IT DOESN’T ALWAYS WORK THAT WAY. Frustrating isn’t it? Sometimes you just have to let things happen, and if you like to always be in control of the events in your life, like I do, it becomes way more difficult 😦 . In relationships with people you have to come to the realization that you can’t control the actions of others, only yourself.

As a Christian I’ve heard the, love your neighbors as yourself spiel, or love your neighbors as Christ loved us. It’s hard to do it though. To actually love people the way Christ did is hard, because he was perfection and we are not. Think about it, he forgave those who did horrible things, people who I know I would have a hard time forgiving. He also gave those people second chances, and third, and fourth, and fifth. According to the bible  “Love prospers when a fault is forgiven, but dwelling on it separates close friends.” So I’m working on it, I’m trying to forgive those who have hurt me, and move on with it, and not have too many expectations on them. I’m learning now, that I will mess up sometimes, and if someone puts huge expectations on me, I’m probably going to expect the same things from them.

I never said I was perfect, but if it’s loving that you want…

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